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Universal Health Insurance for Jesus Freaks Only

Another in a line of great Onion stories. See what we are missing? The Jesus Universal Health Insurance Plan described in the link to the title of this post.Pretty much says it all.Peter Nuhn

44 Responses to “Universal Health Insurance for Jesus Freaks Only”

  1. avatar what says:

    NYTimes/CBS News Poll

    Six in 10 Americans surveyed say the United States should have stayed out of Iraq, and more than 75% say that things are going badly there. The remaining 25% said they can’t for the grand opening of the Creationist Museum in Kentucky.

    Not much of a stretch eh?

  2. avatar what says:

    That was supposed by be “can’t wait for the grand …”. Jeeebus

  3. avatar septos says:

    If 25% can’t wait for the grand opening,that puts 75% dont know or dont care. It’s bad but not hopeless.

    The first gregorian chent was “The world is flat , haallleeellll-aaaaaa-aaaa-uuuuuuuu-ahhhhhhh.”

  4. avatar pnuhn@gampac.org says:

    Karen

    One of the most serious condemnations of religious organizations comes from examples of child abuse and neglect that include severe beatings, rejection of medical care, starvation, forced marriages, child labor, slavery, isolation, exorcism rituals, and sexual molestation as religious practices. The following information was obtained from Children?s Healthcare is a Legal Duty, Inc. (CHILD, Inc.)

    CHILD, Inc. reports that the following religious organizations engage in the practice of rejection of medical care:

    Faith Assembly
    Followers of Christ
    Christian Science
    Church of the First Born
    Faith Tabernacle
    End Time Ministries
    The Believers? Fellowship
    Faith Temple Doctoral Church of Christ in God
    Church of God Chapel
    Jehovahs? Witnesses (forbids blood transfusions)
    Jesus through Jon and Judy
    Christ Assembly
    Christ Miracle Health Center
    Northeast Kingdom Community Church
    ?No Name? fellowship
    The Source

    ?Amy Hermanson, 7, died in 1986 in Sarasota, Florida. A talented little girl, she took piano, violin, harp, and art lessons, and excelled in academic subjects also. Many teachers and employees at her mother’s business observed Amy’s weight loss and lethargy over a four-week period, but did not report to Child Protection Services (CPS). They did not know she had diabetes. Some assumed the parents were providing medical treatment. One employee said she did not report to CPS because she knew the Hermansons were Christian Scientists and they were “signing [her] paycheck.” A neighbor urged her mother to take her to a doctor, but the mother refused. A few minutes later, Amy crawled in from another room on her hands and knees and begged her mother to take her home. Her aunt said that she was incoherent and unable to focus her eyes the day before she died.

    The Hermansons were convicted of felony child abuse and third-degree murder. In 1992, however, the Florida Supreme Court overturned their conviction on fair notice grounds. Citing a religious exemption in Florida’s civil code, the Court said, “The statutes have created a trap that the legislature should address.” Nine years later, however, the Florida legislature still has not done so.? (http://www.childrenshealthcare.org/)

    This is why I was so disgusted over all the Christian crocodile tears that flowed over Schiavo. The Christians are clearly responsible for the law above that made it legal to kill 6 year old Amy, while they work disgustingly to keep a brain dead woman alive. That is my definition of insanity…

    By the way, I learned about this organization and saw the doctor that heads it when I attended an American Atheists Convention. A really good reason for joining American Atheists.

  5. avatar karen says:

    Peter
    i understand.
    I was just not clear in your original post on which side the doctor was- if he was fighting for the crazy xians or for sanity.

  6. avatar imaskeptic says:

    i was an atheist in a catholic high school….then an atheist in vietnam foxholes…then an atheist doctor…many doctors are heathens but won’t admit it…money trumps all(even religion) in medicine and medical research…med schools though are encouraging doctors to pray with their patients if they ask,but i’d rather pick cotton for 6 months than pretend-pray for 6 minutes…i have to file their insurance and they send god cash!!!

  7. avatar reason says:

    thanks for response imaskeptic.i did not become atheist until adulthood my background was methodist they are good people i just came to the view that the facts don’t support supernatural.maybe i am wrong but it seems that many atheists are either catholic or jewish in background.as a practical matter i don’t see a real big gap between mainline protestants and atheists.

  8. avatar DD Dropout says:

    One of my favourite hobby horses.

    If the bible were literally true, then at least for illness, there would be no need for doctors or antibiotics. Mark 16:18 says that any who believe in Jesus will be able to heal the sick by the laying on of hands.

    How does my literalist friend handle that? Allegory. Literal allegory, I suppose.

  9. avatar cry4turtles says:

    “So why not? Why should religion then be brought into it at all?”

    EAC-You’d be surprised how judges pander to the parent that promises to provide for “spiritual needs” in custody hearings. It’s enough to make one sick.

  10. avatar imaskeptic says:

    i agree that many atheists are ex-catholics and jews…some of that may be that they receive on average a better(more years past middle school) education? not a fact…just asking…although episcopalians certainly have their share of non-believers in my experience

  11. avatar imaskeptic says:

    p.s. almost nobody needs antibiotics …religion or no…they are , in america, given to cry-baby patients who think they know everything(even though they’re 12 years shy of a medical degree), to shut them up(not by me)…very soon the churches will be packed by these very whiners praying to their Great Healer for a cure for the “mysterious” antibiotic resistant staph infections that are killing their children and grandparents…already a 35% surge in deaths over the last 2 years!!!…

  12. avatar what says:

    imaskeptic

    You can hardly blame patients for the over-prescription of antibiotics. Most children diagnosed with otitis media don’t really have the infection (at least not bacterial) yet pediatricians offer up gram positive antibiotics before the typical patient can say “otitis what?”. Go to a
    family practice doc for a sore throat and there is a high probability that your going to get a Dx of strep throat and Tx with antibiotics without a culture ever being done. No it is hardly just a patient problem or even mostly so.

    And what’s with all the ellipsis dots. Are you channeling Phreedy Le Phreek?

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