That’s right, on Wednesday, for some period of time, the NGB will be down for (wait for it) an UPGRADE! YEAH!!!!!!What will this mean? I don’t know. Techie Ed says it’s a “performance upgrade”, which is “techie talk” meaning “I don’t know but it’s an upgrade so it must be better”. Just kidding Ed 
This means I’ll have to spend some time AWAY from the blog. It’s been so long. Maybe I’ll take a shower or eat or something.So take some time and let us know what UNrealistic-but-cool-to-have features you’d like to see on this blog. Me? I’d like to see self-zapping posts for those oh-so-special blog entries.
Personally, I’d like a Noodly Appendage function that allows you to edit your comments after you post them.
Wow, an unwashed, malnourished heathen! Nothing gets the ladies hotter, I hear
j/k haha.
An act of God, no doubt.
God being the sysadmin…
Oh dear, he figured it out.
Actually it’s supposed to be a substantial improvement in performance. The new version also has better referral spam detection.
Referrer log spam is bad because every hit looking for porn or cheap cialis, or spammers seeding the log with these keywords, competes with legitimate access. We want this blog to be “quick as a bunny” (that’s more techie talk.)
As to new features, go ahead and dream them up but don’t hold your breath. The problem with adding code hacks is I have to re-do them every time I pick up a new version of the source. It’s like Iraq – once you break it you’re responsible for it forever. So with anything nontrivial I just add them to the official b2evolution wish list and hope the developers get to it eventually.
“Techie Ed”
How about a Satan feature that automatically translates posts written in Christianese into Heathenese so we can understand it? For example it’ll translate “you’re going to burn in hell” into “change your socks, they stink like hell.”
Sheesh, wish I could have an outage on Wednesday, I hate Wednesdays.
Hey Vegebrain, you may be interested in this:
http://www.shipoffools.com/Features/Curses/Curses_body.htmlI pray thou shalt be mocked by eunuchs, O ye wayward winebibber!
GoS: wow, you really love that thing, dontcha, Listen, O ye Amalekite dog, for you will beget difficult teenagers!
It IS pretty funny.
RA, yeah I’m going to build one, I reckon if I can get an electronic version of the Old Testament, index all unique words and sort them into nouns, adjectives etc I could make a generator of biblical passages.
I could produce the “Book of Sod” at the click of a button!
GoS: in Java? I’m a VB/VBA guy myself(Yeah, yeah, I know, MS is Shaitan incarnate, but the RAD is SO easy to use!)
Should be pretty easy to download a bible off the ‘Net. In text format, of course! LOL. Easier to manipulate.
Just stay away from those nasty ole Greek lexicons!
“The Book of Sod”. Sounds like gardening tips. LOL.
RA, nope I’d do it in VB too as I am also a worshipper at the altar of Shaitan (funny i moved from Perl, PHP to MS), I figure a dll called by asp referencing a flat file should be ok for starters.
The hard bits going to be indexing and categorising the text, the more fine I can get the categorisation the better the result I reckon, I’d love to find an XML version of the bible or even the old testament somewhere.
GoS: A dll referencing an ASP? You’re a brave man. I’d just use the ‘Open’ command, build the entire algorithm from scratch, pull the patterns, as it were. (VB 6.0: still haven’t fiddled w/.NET).
Call me old-fashioned, but I’d go w/flat text any old day. TS’ing a dll means digging into it, registering the bloody thing, make sure your ActiveX controls are all up to date (no big whoop, if you’re writing it for URself, but if you distribute,…Brrrhhh!).
FoxPro would probably choke on it (gotta love that old Rushmore tech.!), but Access’d be easier.
You sure you wanna go to DLL HELL? LOL.
Perl. Practical Eclectic Rubbish Lister. Yow. ‘Course, AWK was a mind-bender.
Java sounds like a fun language to do it in. Too bad it’s so bloody slow. But you can port it (good ole JIT!).
Writing it for MS, means writing it for Windows. But it’s SOOO much easier, w/CBFs.
Abel-beth-maachah was a meadow of the house of Maachah, a city in the north of Palestine. I knew that already and did not just type it into Google or anything.
RA, I’d code all the language parsing in the DLL and just use the ASP as a front end web interface. I just got the entire word list of the bible, along with frequencies, next is categorise the words. I’ll start at A…
…Any idea what an “Abelbethmaachah” is? Aparently is occurs twice in the bible!
Stacey6574: Aggghhh! Noooo, not the holy water! Huuccchhh! It burns!
GoS: “Abelbethmaachah”? Say that 1 3 times fast! LOL.
Ahhh “Abelbethmaachah” is a name apparently.
I couldn’t make this sound any loopier than it already is though?
“Tiglathpileser” ROFLMAO
Oh no! Gun of Sod and Reluctant Atheist are speaking in tongues. Satan made ‘em do it. Somebody splash ‘em with the holy water quick!
Stacey
RA
Don’t try this when eating blueberry muffins!
Danke, Ed.
OK, all done.
I hope the blog is at least a little faster now.
Ed
Thanks Ed!
Go with good ole php referencing a postgresql/mysql database. Running on a Linux Box of course.
Ed,
God bless you.
David: what, did Ed sneeze? LOL!
Dogs are shedding. Not that that’s a special occasion or anything. They pretty much shed 24/7/365.
When will this occur?
What’s going on? Maintenance?
Tim
Nevermind. It’s over already.
testing bold
testing italics
homes for sale haddon heights new jersey
homes for sale haddon heights new jersey