At about 15 I began researching on my own. I read the Bible, the Dead Sea Scrolls, The Books of the Apocrypha, The Lost Books of Eden, the Koran, the Talmud, books on Buddhism, Wicca, crystals, astrology and in the end I realized that it all meant the same thing: Nothing.

By 21 I was reading Carl Sagan, and Michael Shermer, and James Randi.

The funny thing is, reading all those biblical variations gave me an absolute fascination for it. I love the mythology of it, and the stories, (though mostly I prefer the stories from the excised books oddly enough). That has developed into a love of all mythology, especially the Joseph Campbell style comparative mythology.

Anyways, I guess I’ve been an atheist as long as I can remember. I never really believed in god, I just didn’t realize that it was actually atheism until I was about 12. My dad has always been an atheist, and my mom has always been a xtian (hence the divorce).

I always questioned the church and the bible and got either no answer or some crap answer that wasn’t good enough for me. I suppose the real “point of no return” came in freshmen year biology, when my teacher, Mr. Dunn, finally gave me a complete and non-biased definition of evolution by natural selection. I just couldn’t deny that it was true.

After the years of resentment and discrimination for xtians, especially mormons, I became fed up completely with all religion, since in the churches eyes, this type of hate is o.k. So here I am now. I didn’t find out about American Atheists or the NoGodBlog until this year, and it feels good that I’m not so alone anymore.

Stay tuned — maybe we’ll be in German next! Achtung!

I was born and raised Mormon, brainwashed like a good Mormon child – baptised at 8, the usual.

A couple things that stand out, though. First off, I always felt uncomfortable praying. I never knew if I was getting a response and always thought I wasn’t listening correctly. Second off, I hated church. It seemed so pointless and I would go through any length to avoid it.

The big one that really threw me was when I was 12 – I was ordained (I think that’s the word) head of the deacons (they pass out the water/bread) and told to choose my second in command. So, I prayed and prayed and prayed aaaand nothing. So I ended up choosing a kid named Kaleb only because I was afraid to choose my best friend David (I though they’d figure God didn’t speak to me). It was then that I really noticed things weren’t right.

Later at the age of 12, my mother pulled us (my two brothers and little sister) out of the church because they weren’t supporting my mother when something happened between my little sister and (then) stepfather. I’d rather not go into it, but it’s something that makes me want to hunt him down and beat him into a pulp.

Anyways, that was my out. My mother turned into a born-again and dragged most of the family with her but I did everything I could to avoid church and eventually weasled out of it altogether.

From there, extensive reading and “soul-searching”. I read about all forms of christianity, tired out buddhism.. found nothing. Turned out I didn’t have a soul.

So here I am, an atheist. A strong atheist, actually. I know my closest younger brother (he’s now 17, I’m 20) is as wel and I believe my older brother (22) is at least an agnostic. My goal in life is to save my little sister (12) from the brain-washing clutches of my controlling mother.

But that’s how I lost my faith and gained a good deal of common sense